This time last year, I was a Christian that rarely cracked a Bible. I was already saved and had been since childhood: God will forgive me if I only hear scripture on Sundays. And that’s true. Because of what Jesus did for us, we are forgiven of all things. But when we fail to spend time in the Word, we fail to spend time with Him. And that makes all the difference in the world.
Reading when it Becomes Convenient
The first Christmas my husband and I were married, my in-laws got me a King James Version Bible. It’s a beautiful purple – my favorite color – has my married name inscribed on the cover, clean pages, and a brand new case to go with it. I truly love it. Having never read the KJV much before, I set out on a mission to read it from cover to cover. I got to Psalms before I stopped.
It wasn’t until I was faced with a big life change – the opportunity to take a new job – that I opened it again. This time at my father-in-law’s advice. After a lot of prayer and scripture reading, I had my answer. But then I acted as though I didn’t need it anymore. I got my answer, right? So my KJV went back to collecting dust.
Developing a Habit
The Bible and my relationship with Jesus became something of a problem solver. That was it, though. There was no internal reflection or telling others about my faith. Becoming “fishers of men” was not on my agenda. I became selfish in my Christianity.
Over the next 2 years or so I would do some reading if I had a purpose, like avoiding looking dumb when we discussed a chapter in Sunday School. While the discussion in my class would earn my attention and garner some interest, that inspiration to continue reading didn’t last long. I was waiting for the next big moment to draw me in. It seems that a lot of my relationship with Jesus had been put on hold until that next moment.
It was a habit that I’d developed and it was negatively impacting my life in ways that I couldn’t see. Going through life without the guidance of the Lord can make it much more difficult than it needs to be.
Bettering Myself
It wasn’t until I ran into complications with my second pregnancy that I put a serious emphasis on my relationship with God. I believe that sometimes He puts things on our path intended solely to redirect our lives. God saw me going a direction that wasn’t planned for me – a life with less and less focus on Him.
I use the YouVersion Bible App. It tracks my use of the app, and has great devotionals as well.
I tend to do two devotionals a day, just because I also love She Reads Truth.
In all honesty, reading the devotionals and the scripture it is based on provide me a time of quiet that I don’t usually get as a Momma to two little ones. And somehow at least one of the devotionals I read each day has something in it that really pertains to me and what I’m going through. I think that’s God’s way of telling me: I’m here.
I’ve seen a change in my life since I started on this path. I feel a calling that I hadn’t really felt before.
How I’ve Changed
Being called is not something I ever saw in myself. My late grandpa was a United Methodist preacher, so I guess I always saw the term “called into ministry” as standing in the pulpit on Sundays. I’m not a huge fan of public speaking.
My sister is the Youth Leader at the church I was raised in, and while her ministry is amazing and you can tell her kids are being reached, that’s not something I ever saw for myself either. I mean, I volunteer in the church nursery from time to time, but considering half of the kids are usually my own, that’s not really what I envisioned either.
Spending time in the Word and with God has opened my eyes to other possibilities. First, the ability to stay home with my kids started as just that. The more I prayed about it, the more I realized I wanted to be able to teach them more about Jesus at home. It had always been a goal of mine to have my kids grow up in the church, but Church is a one-day-a-week kind of thing. I want my kids to know that Jesus is an every day, every hour, every minute kind of thing.
Reaching Out
After having this realization about my kids and their upcoming faith, I felt that God wants me to share what He can do. It’s no secret to the world that my former career was a big chunk of our income (hubby’s a medic – they aren’t paid nearly enough!), but here we are. I’m home with my babies, not stressing at all about our finances.
I’d thought over the idea of starting a blog to see if I could generate some extra income. While that would be nice, that is no longer my goal. I want people that read this to know that there is a God that will provide.
“But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.” -Matthew 6:33
If this post doesn’t reach hundreds, I’m okay with that. If it doesn’t reach a dozen, that’s okay too. But if it reaches just one person and they turn their eyes to Him, I’m happy.
Is there something in your life that strengthens your faith? Is it reading your Bible or prayer? Or is it something else? Let’s chat about it in the comments!