My son is 2 and says “thank you” for everything he receives – his breakfast, his towel after his bath, turning on his favorite cartoon. I’m not going to lie…I see it as a huge parenting win. I almost puffed my chest out a few days ago when he said his thanks to a man holding the door open for us, especially when the man’s eyebrows went up like it was unexpected. I don’t know when manners became surprising from our children, but I know my kids will be well-mannered no matter what society says about it.
“Thank You”
So, how did our 2-year-old boy get to be so polite and well-mannered? It’s pretty simple actually – he follows by example. I’ve always been a polite person – saying, “thank you” for every refill the waitress brings me, “have a good day,” to the cashier at the grocery store, and using “please” in my regular vocabulary. When Clark started learning how to talk, I kicked it up a notch. I am sure to say thank you for every single thing that I could possibly be thankful for, especially if it’s being said to my husband.
I’ve heard some people talk about how giving our verbal thanks to our spouses isn’t necessary, it’s implied. Not in my house! I truly feel that if you feel thankful for something, you should voice it! Even if it is something as simple as my hubby, David, bringing me a bottle of water while I nurse our baby girl.
“Thank you,” is probably Clark’s most used phrase because he hears it all the time! I even say those words to him on a regular basis. There is no reason to not thank my son just because he is 2. If he does something good, I tell him thank you. If he is doing something he isn’t supposed to and stops when I ask him, he hears my thanks.
It’s all a matter of teaching by doing.
“Excuse Me”
Learning “excuse me” was a whole different ball game. It seems a bit confusing when we say “excuse me” when moving past someone and also when we burp. Also, as a toddler boy, burps (and especially farts) are hilarious – thank you, Daddy. Once the laughter subsides, I can usually get Clark to say, “excuse me.” I think that delay has caused a little confusion so far, but he’s getting better.
Teaching Clark to say, “excuse me,” instead of, “move!” was a fun one. Most commonly, he would shout “move” at the dogs when they were in his way. Which, they do get in the way a lot. We love them, but we are quickly running out of space in our home and they take up a lot of it!
It is extra fun now to see Clark say to the dogs, “excuse me!” Cute is not a good enough word.
Since he would mostly use the word “move” with the dogs, I started correcting him there. I would be sure to tell him that it isn’t nice to tell someone to move and saying excuse me is much more kind. He still needs reminding on occasion, but he is picking it up pretty quickly! Seeing it translate over to saying “excuse me” to his Daddy and me is just the icing on the cake.
“Please”
For Clark, please has been the hardest to get a grasp on. Not because he can’t say it, he definitely will say it when prompted. However, it seems like a magic word that gets you whatever you want.
He wants a bite of cake and lets out a long, drawn out, “Pleeeeaaaaseeeeee.”
He wants to watch TV, I hear a “Pleeeeeaaaassseeeee!”
Wants to play with his tablet? “Pleeeeaaaaassseeee!”
On one hand, I want to reward him for saying please. On the other, we can’t always give him what he wants. It just isn’t healthy. This has led to the sporadic use of the word.
We’re still working on figuring this one out, but I feel like he will get there eventually. Just like how my son will copy all of my other vocabulary. This one is a word that I definitely want to be in his wheelhouse. I’ll pick up on my usage and emphasize on getting him to say it more often. Just like saying “thank you,” this word will become a regular, too.
Grace is the key here.
Does your toddler have great manners? How did you get them there? What are their most common phrases? Let’s talk about it in the comments!